User:MaloMart

About me
I wrote my own Zelda game! Aren't I great? Here it is: User:MaloMart/My Zelda Game.

I also wrote a list of cool bad guys! I am so amazing! User:MaloMart/Greatest Villains

So far, the only Zelda games I have played are Twilight Princess, Wind Waker and Ocarina of Time. I've finished Twilight Princess once, Wind Waker twice, and Ocarina of Time once. So far, I like TP the best, then WW, then OoT. TP wins for the whole wolf thing, the enormous overworld and the likeable characters. Plus, Midna rules and Navi and King Daphnes drool. (I actually like Navi and the King, but they're nowhere near as cool as Midna.)

I just recently got Majora's Mask for the Gamecube and have instantly fallen in love.

I am also incredibly self-conscious and often believe that everyone hates me, including everyone on this wiki.

Why Malo?
You may be wondering why I like Malo so much. Because he's awesome, that's why. He's a kid no older than ten who can manage a successful chain of general stores. He's one of the only characters who can actually do things, rather than just getting kids in green tunics and tights to do things for him. In the course of Twilight Princess, he opens a store, builds a bridge, transforms a snooty shoppe into a customers-first shop and gets his own face plastered all over Hyrule. Plus, he employs 2/5 of the Goron government, which means he could completely monopolize all trade from Death Mountain. That means he controls the entire bomb market, the hot spring water market and all the other Goron Merchants out there. I sincerely believe that if he applied himself, this kid could take over Hyrule and hold onto it for quite a bit longer than Ganondorf ever could. After all, Link couldn't kill a doe-eyed kid, could he?

My Timeline
Here's my theory. As we all know, it starts with Ocarina of Time. From then, it branches off into the Adult and Child Timelines. The next game in the Child Timeline is Majora's Mask, obviously, and then Twilight Princess. This is considered to be fact. After Twilight Princess comes the Oracle Series. Why? Because Twinrova is/are dead in the Adult Timeline, so these games cannot be placed there. Secondly, Ganondorf clearly dies in Twilight Princess, and he is resurrected in the Oracle games. These games start Ganon's time as a blue pig. After this comes the original Legend of Zelda, and then Adventure of Link, where Ganondorf is already dead at the beginning.

The Adult Timeline's next game is A Link to the Past. This should be obvious, as the game's intro tells the story of Ganondorf's imprisonment in the Sacred Realm. This also fits here because it explains how Ganondorf escaped the Sacred Realm and went on to cause the Great Flood. He didn't die at the end because Link wished on the Triforce for all the damage to be undone, an unforseen side effect of which would be Ganondorf's resurrection. The next game we know is Link's Awakening. I think it was during this adventure that Ganondorf returned in his "red wrath," and Link was not there to stop him because he was trapped in a whale's dreams. Next is Wind Waker, where Ganondorf dies for good. Dead. Done. No more Ganon. Then it goes on to Phantom Hourglass, the Minish Cap in the New Hyrule, and finally Four Swords.

The only game that doesn't fit this timeline is FSA. If we go by this timeline, Ganondorf is dead for good by the time Vaati shows up. I don't think he was reincarnated, because he lost the Triforce of Power in WW. I suppose it could be a different Ganon, but I don't really buy this. I think that the absolute most likely theory is that Nintendo thought they would make more money if they threw Ganon into the game, so they did.

This leads into my second, most likely theory. The only games that follow a specific timeline are ALttP, OoT, MM, WW, PH, TP and MC. These games all seem to fit easily into the timeline, while the others do not. I personally believe that these were probably the only games Nintendo intended to include in the timeline, and the other games were just filler. I especially don't think the first two games should be included in the timeline, because at that point Nintendo probably had no idea of the extensive timeline and different Links that would show up later on. Based on this theory, here's the timeline:

Child: OoT, MM, TP

Adult: OoT, ALttP, WW, PH, MC

Anyway, that's my theory. Feel free to debate it on my talk page.

Theories I Believe

 * Impaz is a Sheikah and the Hidden Village is Kakariko from Ocarina of Time.


 * Sera's calico cat is named Link. This is a theory i made up myself. She says at one point, "My little kitty Link came back to me." If she is addressing the human Link when she says this than she has really bad grammar. I think it is more likely that Nintendo is continuing the tradition in 3-D Zelda games of naming other things after Link. Sure, a cat isn't as cool as a Goron or a super pig, but I like it nontheless. Therefore, I will always refer to this cat as "Link the cat."


 * The Twili are not any race seen before in the series. They are a brand new race in TP.


 * The Poe Salesman is the Hylian Knight in the same building. They both love ghosts and chaos and they live in the same house. I just don't see that sweet little boy becoming so scary.


 * Nintendo likes to make us suffer. The simple existence of Tingle is proof of that, but if you want more evidence, look in my "Annoying Things" section.

Theories I don't Believe

 * The Gerudo became the Twili. This should be obvious. The Twili race is NOT ALL FEMALE! That should effectively rule out this theory.


 * Stallord is Volvagia. Stallord is roughly ten times bigger.


 * The one eyed man who sees the truth is Bongo Bongo. I just don't buy it and I think it's a little too obscure to be real.


 * Zelda changed her gender to become Sheik. Seriously? The only thing remotely like evidence for this is that Ruto called Sheik a man. Why would Zelda reveal her identity to Ruto? Ruto believes the same thing Link believes. Some people say that Sheik must be male because his grunts sound male. Yes, that's because Zelda's in disguise. She's not going to go around using her normal voice. A crazy theory in my opinion.


 * The Man from the Trading Post and the Man from the Curiosity Shop are the same person. Like Cremia and Romani, they're just two separate Terminan counterparts of the same Hyrulean.


 * Jabu-Jabu is Jabun. Jabu-Jabu was clearly just a dumb fish, while Jabun could speak and know enough not to go around eating random people.


 * Zant is an Oocca. Worst. Theory. Ever.

Theories I'm not sure about

 * Kaepora Gaebora is Rauru. I can see the similarities, but I'm still not entirely convinced.


 * Zoras evolved into Rito. I can see the evidence for this, but I just can't imagine fish evolving into birds.


 * The Hero's Shade is the Hero of Time. Ehh, I really can't make up my mind on this one.

How I Intend to make the Legend of Zelda Movies
I plan to be a director/screenwriter for a career, and I greatly want to make movies of the Legend of Zelda series. With the series as it is now, this is how I would do it: I would only make movies of "The Big Three." I consider the Big Three to be OoT, WW, and TP. Why? Because these are 3-D and therefore some of the most popular games. I know Majora's Mask also fits into this category, but it does not fall under the main storyline of the series, and I don't want to make this series too long, so I would have it cut.

First would come Ocarina of Time, duh. It's the first chronologically, and it sets up all other movies. At the end, I would make some note about the split timeline so the next movies would make sense. Twilight Princess comes next, showing what happens in the Child Timeline. Then Wind Waker would be last. Why this way? Because Wind Waker is epic. I may like TP more as a game, but the storyline of WW is so final and climactic that I feel it has to come at the end. Besides, something would feel wrong about making a movie of a post-Hyrule world, and then going back to Hyrule for TP. Therefore, Wind Waker comes last.

If I feel these movies haven't made me quite rich enough, I might make Majora's Mask as a prequel to TP and sequel to OoT. Might.

Overall
The "Warning: Your life energy is low!" sound. I get it, I get it already! I can see this without an alarm to tell me!

Twilight Princess
1. Rollgoal

2. The wagon scene

3. Darkhammer

4. The Golden Bug Sidequest

5. Plumm

6. The Sacred Grove Guardian Statue's puzzle

7. FIGHTING FOUR DARKNUTS AT ONCE!

Wind Waker
1. The "stealth" part of the Forsaken Fortress

2. Floormasters grabbing the people you're trying to protect

3. The Earth Temple and pretty much every enemy inside it, especially Blue Bubbles

4. The Mirror Shield

5. That one submarine full of Bombchus

6a. The fact that you have to collect 144 figurines, your camera can hold three photos at a time, and you have to wait a full day for that stupid guy with his stupid hairpiece to carve just one figurine. WHY DO YOU HATE US, NINTENDO?

6b. While we're on the Nintendo Gallery topic, the fact that Kogoli, without warning, vanishes and deprives you of ever getting his picture again. I can see no logical reason for this other than that Nintendo hates us.

7. Tingle

Ocarina of Time
1. WALLLLLLMAAAAAAASTERRRRRRRRS!

2. The Water Temple, duh.

3. The Lens of Truth.

4. Dampe's maze.

5. Moblins.

6. Kaepora Gaebora.

7. Navi repeating something you already know/telling you something that doesn't apply because you're in the past.

Scary Things
1. ReDeads. I think it is a widely accepted fact that these things are terrifying. If I can, I always try to kill them from a distance.

2. Blue Bubbles. Even more than ReDeads, I dread an encounter with a swarm of Blue Bubbles.

3. Arbiter's Grounds. I'm probably alone in this, but I found everything in that temple scary.

4. The Ghost Ship. Creepy music, scary enemies, a freaky portrait. You do not want to do this part of the game at night.

5. The Twilight Realm. Even though it wasn't ever very difficult, I found the whole place spooky. It was probably a combination of the music, the weird orange lighting, and the fear of encountering a group of Shadow Beasts.

6. Wind Waker Stalfos. This is because they are the only enemies that seriously don't care if you attack them. They will continue to raise that mace of theirs and proceed to knock you halfway across the room.

7. Twilight Princess Darknuts. Note that I say Darknuts. One isn't scary. More than one, on the other hand, is nightmare-inducing.

8. The Cave of Ordeals. It's dark and filled with all sorts of bad things.

9. Dead Hand. Do I really need to explain?

10. Iron Knuckles. Unlike Darknuts, even one of these things gives me nightmares. That axe does more dmage than both King Bulblin's axe and Link the Pig.

Underrated Things
1. Twilight Princess. For reasons I don't get, this game has so many people who hate it. Why? The plot was good, the characters were great and the gameplay was smooth. Some say it wasn't original enough, but what about the whole wolf thing? Besides, since when does something need to be original to be fun? It doesn't have to be your favorite Zelda game, but you should all accept that it is a quality game.

2. Zant. Personally, I liked that he went insane at the end. That's what made him different from every other video game villain (except Majora). It added a bit more to his character. Some people don't get how he could change from sane to completely bonkers so suddenly, but I think it's pretty clear. Most people can act sane when everything is going their way, but when your plot to rule a nation is foiled and the princess you cursed and banished is coming for you with her dragon-slaying, Balrog-crushing, skeleton-slaying friend, you'd go crazy too.

3. Wind Waker bosses. I admit that Gohma and Kalle Demos were too easy, but I thought that every boss after that was pretty tricky. Puppet Ganon made me want to smash my controller, my game system, my TV and the Nintendo headquarters.

4. Navi. Sure she could get annoying, but for some people to wish her dead? I personally don't believe death should be wished on any Zelda character (except Tingle).

Overall
1. How does Tingle exist in two separate timelines, set thousands of years apart? '''Favorite Answer: Tingle can't die. No one can bear being around him long enough to kill him.'''- Oni Dark Link

2. How do Gerudo reproduce?

3. How do Gorons reproduce?

Ocarina of Time
1. How does a puny dragon like Volvagia eat Gorons? Favorite Answer: He poisons them in their sleep and slowly eats them bit by bit.-Zelda311

2. Who pierced Link's ears while he was asleep in the Temple of Light? Favorite Answer: They grew there.-Zelda311

3. What business does a cow have in a cave?

4. Who wrote the Song of Storms? (If Link learned it from Guru-Guru, and Guru-Guru learned it from Link, where did it come from?)

Majora's Mask
1. Why does the Bean Seller live in a cave under the Deku Palace?

2. Why did the Skull Kid feel the need to put up balloons with Majora's Mask on them?

3. What is Gabora?

Wind Waker
1. How does Beedle manage to beat you to wherever you want to go in the Great Sea, despite the fact that he seems to only move his boat in circle around an island? Further more, how does the Postman do this in Hyrule? '''Favorite Answer: If you blow up his boat smoke will come out... it’s a plane in disguise. Plus, he stalks Link.'''- Oni Dark Link

2. Why is the sage of the Earth Temple a bird, and the sage of the Wind Temple a little tree man? Shouldn't it be the other way around?

3. Why does Ganondorf turn to stone after being killed?

4. Why does Gohdan have arrows up his nose? '''Favorite Answer: He sneezes out a Heart Container after you beat him (and you're wondering about arrows?)... I'm guessing he tried using the arrows to get the Heart Container out.'''- Diachronos

5. What do rats in Wind Waker need money for? '''Favorite Answer: They don’t need it. They just don’t like Link having it.'''- Oni Dark Link

6. Why is it that the gods' best way of helping the people of Hyrule is to flood their land and kill probably a large number of them?

7. Why can't Link swim when he was raised on a tropical island?

Twilight Princess
1. Why can a wolf understand what cats, frogs and even squirrels say?

2. Why didn't Ganondorf in Twilight Princess use his "Flaming Head" form on Link in the final battle? Furthermore, why possess Zelda when he could easily fight Link himself?

3. What the hell was that bit with Zant cracking his neck?

4. Why is the Sky Cannon in Renado's basement? '''Favorite Answer: The real question here should be "why did Renado build his house on a giant cannon" since the cannon clearly came first. As for why he did it, I have no idea.'''- Xykeb Zraliv

Polls
Which Link is the best? Legend of Zelda/Adventure of Link A Link to the Past/Link's Awakening Ocarina of Time/Majora's Mask Oracle of Ages/Seasons Wind Waker/Phantom Hourglass a.k.a Toon Link Minish Cap/Four Swords Twilight Princess The one from my game

Who is Link's best sidekick? Navi Tatl The King of Red Lions Ezlo Midna Ciela

What is the most annoying? Navi Tingle Falbi Ciela The Water Temple

Who is the best villain? Ganondorf Majora Aganhim Nightmare Veran Onox Twinrova Vaati Dark Link Zant King Bulblin

What is your favorite race? Hylian Human Goron Zora Gerudo Sheikah Deku Fairy Garo Twili Deity Korok Rito Fishman Kokiri Oocca Yeti Yook Anouki Monkey Skull Kid Stal Poe Minish The 'Blins

What is your favorite playable race? (Which one is your favorite to play as?) Hylian Rabbit Deku Goron Zora Deity Seagull Rito Korok Wolf Cucco

Which old video game quote is the best? I am Error. A winner is you!!! All your base are belong to us. Shine Get! Anything said by the Old Man in the original LoZ I wonder what's for dinner.

Is Malo a cool character? Yes No Omigod yes!!!!! No way Who?

Which is the best? Hookshot Longshot Clawshot Double Clawshots Grappling Hook

Mini-Bosses
These are my rules for what is a mini-boss and what is a regular enemy.

1. A mini-boss must be defeated in order to progress through the game.

2. Defeating a mini-boss is never optional.

3. If a mini-boss is a member of a "regular enemy" species, it can still be a mini-boss if it has a unique attack pattern or appearance.

4. Two or more regular enemies does not qualify as a mini-boss.

Ocarina of Time
1. Deku Scrub Brothers. There is a unique way to fighting them that other Scrubs don't have, making them a mini-boss.

2. Parasitic Tentacle. They are all completely mandatory to kill.

3. Bigocto. This one is obvious.

4. Poe Sisters. They all must be defeated, and they have an unusually high amount of health.

5. Flare Dancer. Same thing as Poe Sisters.

6. Dark Link. Would anyone disagree?

7. Dead Hand. Whenever it appears, it's guarding an item.

8. Gerudo Guards. Necessary to defeat.

9. Nabooru. Not just a normal Iron Knuckle.

10. Black and White Iron Knuckles. At first I didn't consider them a mini-boss, but they have a unique appearance.

Wind Waker
1. Searchlight Bokoblins (First time only). These guys fight like normal Bokoblins, but the fight is different because you have no sword.

2. Phantom Ganon. There's only one of him, and he must be defeated at least three times.

3. Red Wizzrobe. It looks unlike the others, and it has higher health.

4. Big Octo. Though it may break several of the rules, I cannot declare this guy to be just an enemy.

Twilight Princess
1. Big Deku Baba (Forest Temple only). You need to kill it to save the monkey.

2. Ook.

3. King Bulbin. He is always mandatory to fight.

4. Dangoro.

5. Big Shadow Kargaroc. You can't win without killing its rider and making it yours.

6. Twilit Bloat. This guy is almost a boss, but not quite.

7. Deku Toad.

8. Fourth Poe. The others are just normal enemies. Only this one has unique movements.

9. Death Sword.

10. Darkhammer.

11. Temple of Time Darknut. It looks unlike the others in the game.

12. Aeralfos guarding Double Clawshot. It has a unique battle strategy.

13. Phantom Zant.

Characters who I love but did not have room for

 * Shad
 * Ashei
 * Salvatore
 * Lenzo
 * Yeta
 * Zant
 * Rusl
 * Orca
 * Postman
 * Ilia

Speed Challenges
This is where users compete for the best time in various game-based speed challenges. I will post several of these challenges below. Post your best time under these challenges. The current leader will be awarded the Postman Award. Feel free to make a userbox stating you've won this coveted award.



Hyrule Derby
Challenge 1: A full lap around Twilight Princess's Hyrule Field on horseback. Start at the Kakariko Gorge warp point, ride north to the Bridge of Eldin, cross it and enter the Lanayru Province, cross the Great Bridge of Hylia, cross the southern part of Hyrule field and end back at the Kakariko Gorge bridge. Rules: No warping and no getting off your horse. Current Record: 4:30
 * 4:30 Xykeb  Yvolix  Zraliv  22:00, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Great Sea Challenge
Challenge 2: Sail from the dock at Outset Island to Windfall Island. Rules: Make sure the King of Red Lions is right at the dock (this can be forced by going inside, then coming out), no warping. Current Record: 5:50
 * 5:50 I could have done it a bit faster, but I got hit by a Seahat near Cyclops Reef. Xykeb  Yvolix  Zraliv  22:30, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Hyrule Marathon
Challenge 3: This is a bit more open-ended. Start at the Death Mountain Crater warp point and run to the start of the Haunted Wasteland. You can use any way to get there, as long as you run. Rules: No warping, no Epona. Current Record: 3:47
 * 3:47 I'm sure I could've done better, but whatever. Maybe I'll try it again later. Xykeb  Yvolix  Zraliv  22:44, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Snowpeak Challenge
Challenge 4: How fast can you beat the Yetis' snowboarding challenge? Current Record: 1:15
 * 1:15 Xykeb  Yvolix  Zraliv  22:00, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Zora's River Air Race
Challenge 5: Fly the giant Kargaroc up Zora's River as quick as you can. Rules: No warping. Current Record: 1:19
 * 1:19 Xykeb  Yvolix  Zraliv  22:00, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Signatures
Now sign my page or this wiki will run red with blood.

Oni <font color="#7F007F">Dark <font color="#007A00">Link 20:59, 17 August 2009 (UTC) <- this is a signature

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